


Gay as shit

by naruffi



Category: the gay squad
Genre: Other, marry me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2015-09-13
Packaged: 2018-04-20 16:34:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4794539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/naruffi/pseuds/naruffi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>i don't know what im doing<br/>i love youuuuuuu</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gay as shit

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how to write.  
> And Stephanie is besterrrrrr.  
> hmph

The guards and servants tried their best to ignore the weeping coming from the throne. They knew the consequences of disrupting the queen's sns time. "Pardon m'lady, you have a visitor" Any sound coming from the kingdom stopped. Clearly this bitch didn't get the memo. The queen stood up from her blorange throne and stared at this beast. Not only had he interrupted her fangirling/dying but he spoke the words of the neckbeard, a banished clan of heathens. The queen, Stephanie, was known for being violent. She summoned her official ranch bringer and threw multiple ranch and ketchup packets at him. "To the dungeon! 500 years!" she declared, staring at the beast. Rumor has it she consumes souls this way. She sat back down, clearly irritated. The workers knew she was not in a very good mood, she usually sentenced ~300 years.

The girl had been waiting 78349169 minutes for someone to take her to the queen. She wasn't anything special and thought perhaps they have forgotten about her. 'Maybe I should just go in?' she wondered. It was unusually quiet. Perhaps that was her cue. She opened the door and walked into the room. The queen looked up, shocked and the workers stared. The girl realized that was definitely not her cue. She could feel herself blush as all eyes were on her. She looked down and squeezed her helmet in embarrasment. The armor was hiding her ripped hella manly muscles.

"Ummmmmmmmmm" she muttered. "Shouldn't you be bowing?" the queen said, totally reking the girl. The girl forgot that the queen was a himedere and got on one knee as she commanded. She looked up at the queen, studying her.The queen was wearing a blue and orange dressthingy. Actually, now that she's noticed, the entire room was a combination of blue and orange. This must be those mythical creatures she was known to obsess over. 'Nairu?' she thought, no that's not it. Besides this odd color choice the queen was exceptionally beautiful. "hot damn" she whispered. Stephanie was totallllyyyyyy not white and had long black hair with eyes to match. Eyes that have killed more than any soldier. She could feel the queen staring at her and snapped back to reality. "That's odd. No one survives my death stare. Your cute we should get married." The queen said. The girl was shocked and turned an even deeper shade of red. The queen, too, was surprised at her own gayness, "Ummm I mean what is your name mysterious traveler?"

"Jessica Hitler ,your majesty"

"Yeah we're gonna change that. How about Jessica Gay?"

"welp"

Jessica got back up, allowing the queen a better view. She saw a delicate small frame and oddly found Jessica very pretty. Had she been wearing her glasses, however, she would have seen how manly and cool and amazing Jessica was. Jess will later be constantly reminded of this. She tri so hard.

"Why are you here Jess?"

Jess had been so entranced by how amazing this queen looked that she had completly forgotten why she was here. Mainly because the author forgot too. Something about wanting to be her knight? Yes. Good idea author. Jess was wondering why she was thinking in the third person but decided not to dwell on it.

"I have come to protect and serve you. I wish to be a knight."

"ABSOLUTELY NOT" The queen replied, startling the both of them. She tried to recompose herself.

"You are too pretty to die out in the field. I wish to keep you instead"

Jess didn't know what to say. She had trained all her life to be a knight and die for her queen. This changes everything. Surprisingly, the girl didn't seem to mind much either. Live with the queen and not have to die? Hella.

The queen got up her from her throne and slowly walked down the steps seperating the queen and the common girl. Once they were face to face, the queen swiftly picked her up and ran to her room. The poor girl did not have time to protest only allowing a "but" to escape.

Now in the Stephanie's bedroom, they sat closely on the bed in silence. They were both shocked at how quickly this was going. They both obviously had feelings for each other and now here they were. Stephanie was known for being an aroace, only interested in the gay men(WITH PLOT) in her animes. Yet here she was, inviting this random girl to move in to her palace to be hers to keep. What was she even going to do with her? She quickly glanced at Jess again. Yeah we're totally gonna get married, she thought. She took out her magical iBox and together they scrolled through tumblr for hours, inching closer and closer together. Jess didn't even think how tumblr and vine were banned where she came from. For her new love she would do anything, like write a fic, for example.

"So what do we do?" The queen asked, breaking the silence that excess cuddling brought.

"Can we watch Orange is the New Black?" Jess asked. Her netflix account had been taken away and was aching to see the next season.

Ignoring this request, they instead watched Stephanie's animes together. Jess held Stephanie and tried not to make jokes as the queen cried/died. After some time, the queen eagerly stood up. Her heart was pounding.

"Let me kiss you" she declared

This shocked Jess, making her return to her tomato state. Thankfully, Stephanie loved tomatoes.

They leaned in closer, and as the was about to close in between their lips Stephanie stuck her toungue out. Jess tri so hard. The queen giggled and bit Jess's nose, confusing her more. This must be some royal way to show love, Jess thought, so she did the same.

"Stop trying to rip off my fic, Jess" The queen jokingly said. Jess was wondering why she was thinking of this. Why would the queen say that? She decided to once again ignore it and continue on with the story

After a night of fluffing and smuting (and I mean a lot of fluff and smut. Like hot damn call Makoto and Rin but actually don't because cockblockers), the girls awoke, tangled. In reality only Jess awoke, Stephanie had been watching Jess sleep for most of the night. Seeing her open her eyes she quickly kissed Jess on the nose. Tomato Jess clinged harder, never wanting this moment to end. But it did. Stephanie quickly got up wearing an all white ball gown. Jess rubbed her eyes thinking she was still in that weird dream.

"While you were sleeping I arranged our wedding. I had a dress custom made for you and you're wearing it right now lets go the priest is here"

"bu.." Jess tried to say. Stephanie had again lifted her up suddenly. She most likely got so strong from throwing things at all the fuckbois, neckbeards, and nh shippers.

Anyway they got marrieds and lived a very gay life as Mrs. and Mrs. Gay which was very confusing but waever they were marrieeeeeeeeed. I forgot how to write the end.

**Author's Note:**

> You can stop laughing now.


End file.
